Bone Appeteat

Far be it from me to poke fun at any Europeans' English.  With the exception of the German-speaking countries, nowhere is the locals' English worse than my abilities in their own language.  This, however, couldn't keep us from a smile or two (alright - also some belly laughs) when recently reviewing the English-language menu kindly provided to us at a small tapas bar in Seville, Spain.

It all started with: "Clouds of Chicken" .  We've all seen clouds with shapes that remind us other things, but fowl?  And on my plate?
Then we had: "Muffled Shrimp".  Makes sense to me: if there's anything I hate it's a loud-mouthed little guy.
This was quickly followed by: "Mussles to the Garlic".  And, right behind: "Eggplant to the Oven".  What is this - a menu order, or some twisted Hitler Army order?
Up until this point, all seemed well.  I'm sure I could have enjoyed any of these unpredictable meals.  But the final entree remained, I'm afraid, off limits: "Cream of Scum". 
It was about at this point that we asked where the nearest McDonalds was...

I Admit It...I Really Like Beer

                                And here, the proof positive.

Maybe He Should Use the Partner's Name

While it may not be as bad as a barber shop named Sweeney Todd, I'm not convinced this hair dresser in Brussels has chosen the ideal name for his undertaking...

Another Tough Day...

Maybe if we're good, really good, in this life, in the next one we'll get to come back as cats.  We can only hope!

Sunset in Split

    Taken from my hotel room balcony in Split, Croatia, last week...

Woman's Best Friend

OK, sure: he may lick himself at times and in places that are not always appropriate.  But I think that a few minor character flaws can be overlooked when he's willing to hang out the laundry to dry.  Hey Fido: sic sheets!

It'll Never Get Off the Ground, Wilbur!

I guess every generation since 1903 has been astounded at the size of aircraft, wondering how the laws of physics can possibly allow something so large and heavy to get off the ground.  I remember as a boy in the 1970s staring in awe at a Boeing 747 at the San Francisco airport.
Well, 747s are certainly no big deal anymore and these days are used more for cargo than passengers.  Now we have even larger aircraft, carrying more people greater distances, and forcing any rational person to wonder, yet again, how something this size could ever fly.
I got a chance to see one of the new Airbus A-380s up close and personal at the Frankfurt airport recently.  If your jaw doesn't drop when to see one of these behemoths, I think you're just bored with life.  So now the obvious questions about comparisons with 747s.  The 380 is only about 7 feet longer than a 747 and about 16 feet taller.  But the width is hard to believe: the Airbus's wingspan is a full 50 feet longer than the Boeing!  The new double-decker can carry well over 500 passengers, while the older 747, "only" about 340.  One can only wonder how long it takes to get your luggage after landing, you and the other 500 tired fliers... 
One final stat: the maximum take-off weight of the A-380 is 1.2 million pounds.  What hath the Wright Brothers wrought!